Quest for Eldorado ....

You never find it ... no matter how hard you try... You never find true happiness .. true joy or true satisfaction.. it's always a few inches ahead of you...you think you can reach it with your finger tips if you stretch enough.. but all the stretching falls short by a hair's breadth. At times I think I will be happy if I get just this 1 last thing.. but I am never happy... I don't mean I am sad ... it's just that I don't know yet what being ecstatic is. What would it feel like to sleep one night without having a few thousand goals and desires in my mind.

On second thoughts wouldn't that sleep be death. End of desires, goals, amibitions and wants. Wouldn't I be reduced to a vegetable. Do I really want an end to desires ? After all everytime I reach a goal and set 10 more goals formyself I am progressing, growing as an individual and moving closer to the peak called success. I am where I am today because I dared to dream big and I have even bigger dreams today. Dreams which I hope to turn into reality one fine day. Maybe I love myself for what I am. Someone who is never staisfied with what she has. I always want what I don't have and fight tooth and nail to get it. I don't always get it but I never feel I did not try. I love all my failures as much as I love my success since they taught me where to draw the lines for dreaming. One day I will stop dreaming... and chasing my dreams.. and maybe that day I would be virtually dead. But till then I will always keep searching for that elusive quality called true happiness.

My Life as a student

I am a student again. After 3 years of working as a professional in the IT industry I am back in school. When I give it a thought I love the fact that I worked for 3 years before I returned to studies but just once in a while I don’t. I love the fact that I have a lot of knowledge about the industry and how it functions, I know what it means to be a professional and I love the fact that being older than most students here I realize I am running short of time and time is precious, so I try and never waste time. What I don’t like is living life on a shoe string budget. That sucks !!! I don’t like that being so much elder to students here I cannot find many like minded people to befriend. I always end up feeling so ….. OLD. And lastly I miss getting drunk till the wee hours in the morning with a bunch of friends on a Friday night.

New Life !!

A new life.. a new city.. a new country and lots to look forward to. After one and a half months in US I have to admit I love this country. It isn’t exactly what I had expected but then my expectations have always been very high. Yet it inspires me to strive harder and move towards my goal. After my first visit to New York a friend asked me “Did you get the feel that Manhattan is the place where you belong ??” My reply was “ No.. I didn’t get that feel but I did know this is where I WANT to belong someday. A part of the group of people who make the world economy and businesses run.” . the biggest and most dynamic city in the world, New York epitomizes everything that I had thought about America.