Wednesday, 15 December 2010

In her Mind

Maya was cold and shivering. Not so much from the cold as from fear. It was the eve of Christmas and she was all alone in her apartment pondering about her life. It had been a long time since she felt in control of her life and career. Her work was making her edgy, the years seem to be rolling by and age was catching up with her real fast. Nothing felt right anymore. She had no one around who she could trust wholly and no one who would have faith in her. It was a strange place to be in. For someone who never doubted her own ability it was a new and bad feeling. In all the years she had been alone she always believed that she could do anything and her determination and hard work would pay off. Now she was having second thoughts, maybe just maybe she was not cut out for this. However giving up was not an option for her. She saw no alternative path and sometimes that made her suicidal but she knew even that would be same as giving up.
Lately she was seeing so many people around her take the easy way out. For some of them it was working out well and for some not so much and somehow the cynic in her told her that if she tried it she would be in the latter group. This was not the life she wanted anyways. It was hard to imagine that someone who at the age of 15 knew that the only thing important and worth doing was becoming successful wasn't even close to success after so many years. People younger than her had gone on to do mind boggling things which had changed the world forever. She was still grappling with the basics in life. Was it possible that she was not meant to do anything amazing at all ?

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