The Deep End

So I lost another one of my friend to the fiend called 'wedding'. Ok, so I have nothing against people getting married and I would love to get married someday but what I don't like is the fact that everyone thinks getting married is a perfectly valid and acceptable reason for getting rid of old friends. I hate it, yes I do. I hate being pushed aside and becoming just a part of the background in people's life. That brings me to the main point of this post. How am I dealing with it ? Briefly put, not too well... in multiple words I am looking for my lost friends in people I don't know and for most part they are not people I should try and befriend. But just like the beggar who can't be a chooser I have no options. It's not like in an ideal world I would make such people my friend but sometimes I do want to have people I can fall back on, uh well.. that's stretching it a little too far. Not really fall back on but kill time with...just idle banter. Some of it is self-destructive and I know that for a fact but I still stick to it. Being alone is no fun.. and no I don't want to get engaged or married but just need a real friend. How hard is that ? With social networking booming my social life seems to have come to a standstill. Almost like "Water water everywhere......not a drop to drink".